There’s one sad truth in life I’ve found
While journeying east and west –
The only folks we really wound
Are those we love the best.
We flatter those we scarcely know,
We please the fleeting guest,
And deal full many a thoughtless blow
To those who love us best.
~Ella Wheeler Wilcox
How sadly true the words Ella shares above, we are more often guilty of hurting the very ones we love the most! However ill intended it may be, it is a fact we tend to mistreat those we are close to and flatter those we hardly know. We are then left with one very important action, and that is to seek forgiveness from those we love through apology.
Some of you will recall the old 1970 movie by Eric Segal starring Ryan O’Neal and Ali McGraw. A very touching love story of two young people who meet fall in love and then tragedy strikes. The most famous line of the movie was “Love means never having to say you’re sorry” Well, were this true, there would be possibly no love in existence at all. Very idealistic and I must say, wow it would be great were it possible!
Why might you think that this is so? I have a few thoughts on this myself, but would interested in how you see this as well! For one, we grow familiar with people through time and tend to expect a lot from them. We expect them to see things as we do, or at least to know us well enough to understand why we act the way we do. It is a bit pretentious but true, “she (he) should just accept me as I am, beside she (he) knows I love her (him) so what it the big deal!?” Or two, “why do I have to always admit mistakes, she (he) has made her (his) share of mistakes and he (she) never apologizes to me! The old always and never fallacy!
We expect a lot out of those we love, and tend to forget just how important reassurances are in a relationship. It takes a lot of humility to love someone and it kills our pride to have to admit that we are not perfect as much as we would think we are. Well, we aren’t perfect and so it unfortunately is necessary to admit this fact especially if we have hurt someone due to our lack of sensitivity towards them. If we can rest assured with the fact that no one has of yet died of indigestion after having swallowed their pride, then we can be certain that it can’t be so harmful to swallow it now and then. In fact it not only is not harmful it is healthy to apologize when we have wronged someone.
When you do apologize, it is a true sign that you are not thinking just about yourself, but you are taking into consideration the feelings of others. So, given that fact, it is a definite sign of love, therefore saying you are sorry is saying that you do care and that you do love…it is love! It takes courage, it takes humility, it takes love, so if you need to apologize for something, go for it! It usually takes the air out of anyone that may be upset with you for something you did, and most often it can help solve a lot of problems before they become even bigger.